Question by Rynn: How do I learn to actually like myself?
I am a 28 year old woman. I would say I'm moderately attractive -- friends have said that i'm pretty. (I am not being cocky) Fairly smart -- bachelors in engineering and masters in geology. I am quite fit -- participating in a number of activities (climbing, surfing, rowing, softball, yoga, soccer) and competing in some (was a D1 athlete in college). I am by no means the best but I hold my own. I am easy going and fun -- always up for a new adventure. But I am so sad inside, I feel completely worthless. I honestly hate myself. Over the years I've become very good at hiding this and pretending to be happy -- no one wants to be around a 'debbie downer'. I have been depressed my whole life. I was in 5th grade the first time i seriously contemplated suicide. My mom though it was normal for her pre-teen/teen to come home and cry to her every night -- she didn't know what to do. It wasn't until things got really bad in college (i dated a verbally abusive guy) and I had to seek help. I was diagnosed with clinical depression and being bipolar. I went to numerous therapists / physiologists and was put on meds. All of it helped, but didn't cure anything. I learned what it was like to feel happy. So i would replicate it -- forcing myself to be. I know I don't appear to be fake to people because I have been told that I am the super positive, uber happy friend (if they only knew). I love traveling and just moved to Australia to try something new -- maybe find somewhere I fit in and belong. I'm from the US and have lived in 4 states and Central America for a bit.
A huge thing that bothers me is that I'm single and fear that I will be forever. Most of my friends are guys but consider me like their sister. I've gone traveling with guy friends overseas, one on one, but strictly platonic. I've tried dating sites several times and have been on 10+ dates, but they're all really weird/awkward. I haven't had a boyfriend since I was 20 and it's really affecting my self-esteem. In the past year I can't even get a guy to ask me out on a date. I have asked but always get rejected. I think some of it comes down to my father never wanting me. i found out after he died (suicide) that he was living 20 min away from me for the last 8 years and never tried to contact me. No guy will ever want me. I have tried to avoid family situations over the last 5 or so years because I am so sick of everyone asking me why I don't have a bf. The real kicker was when I overheard someone ask my mom when she will get grandkids and she responded with probably never. (I am an only child). I feel like I am a disappointment to everyone and in everything I do.
i want to think things will get better, but hope is slowly fading. How do I learn to actually like myself?
Best answer:
I don't know. I imagine near- everyone deals with this question at some point in there life.
Drawstring Yoga Shorts
yoga of time travel - click on the image below for more information.
- 100% Cotton Shorts
- drawstring around waist
- great selection of colors
- Hip, trendy, cool.
- several shirts to go with if you scroll down
yoga of time travel
Drawstring yoga shorts in great colors. 100% cotton. Great colors.
Drawstring Yoga Shorts
Click on the button for more yoga of time travel information and reviews.
The Luxury of Time
Article by Rita Borges
One of the most luxurious things you can do in Paris is to simply spend time there, to not feel rushed. To allow yourself to saunter and shop, savor and sample. To feel and become a local, as if you live there and to feel as if you have all the time in the world to explore its secrets.
There is a sense of serenity in traveling this way. There is rarely a sense of serenity when you stay in a hotel when you travel, yet you can easily attain it by renting a Paris luxury vacation rental instead. Especially in Paris, where luxury hotels can often be a scene in the lobby as guests come and go and often have smaller than desired rooms that make you feel a bit cramped at times.
Being released from all of that and renting a large spacious Paris apartment is a true luxury in comparison. You can breathe a sigh of relief there. You won't have to deal with the restrictions of space that can make travel stressful. Stress is not a luxury.
Let's say you end up doing a lot of shopping. You can neatly stow all your bags in the closets in your apartment and not feel as if it is reducing your living space. Let's say you want to entertain, an apartment gives you the luxury of a dining table and full kitchen. Whether you cook or have your dinner party catered, it will feel like home and it will allow you to go on with your normal life and not restrict it because you do not have the room in a luxury hotel room. Even it is a suite, you still can't compare entertaining in your hotel suite with entertaining in your luxury apartment in Paris, can you?
Let's say you want to invite friends to stay or have grand children you want to come visit. Or you have kids and want to be able to bring their nanny as well to take care of them. You have the room!
Or you want to do business from your laptop on a nice big desk with enough space to spread out your papers and even have a secretary come in and help you once in a while during your stay. Not so easy in a hotel room and a bit too intimate a setting to invite in a secretary to work. But you have that luxury in a Paris apartment.
What about being able to continue your yoga practice or daily diet regime while you are in Paris? Honestly, this is very hard to find extra room in a hotel room. And it is hard to maintain your diet if you have to have all your meals out in restaurants. The luxury of having a rented apartment in Paris is the ability to lay out your yoga mat and stretch away. It is the luxury of having a kitchen which you can stock with your specific diet foods so you can control your intake.
What if you simply want time? Simply, time to be left alone to sleep all day if you choose and not be bothered by the hotel maid. You want time to take out your easel and paint brushes and paint next to a window with northern light, where you don't have to feel as if you have to clean up before the maid comes in. You want time to shop in every open air market in Paris and come back home to cook to your heart's content. You want time to shop and spread out all your purchases on a spare bed. You want time to take a class and have the teacher come to your place to instruct you. Again, a hotel room would feel a bit too intimate and constricting for that kind of activity.
So to spend your time luxuriously when you are in Paris, the ultimate is to block off more than a few days from your calendar and to rent your own Paris apartment. Then enjoy, with total serenity, all that Paris has to offer.
Orignal From: How do I learn to actually like myself?
No comments:
Post a Comment